The Loss of a Loved One...

I have horrible news.. my Japanese Beta... Charlie died late last Thursday evening...He was found several blocks away from his mediocre tank lying in a dehydrated heap on my beige carpet. No one claims to have seen or heard anything. He was a mere 4 months old..

It was quite a sad morning.. but I made up for it by buying 2 other Beta's and 5 mini-goldfishes..

I see in your future,...a naughty, naughty strip dance

I thought I was all up to date when I realized I didn't tell you about Jane's Party this past Friday.. or about the mischief that propagated from that endeavor. Nor did I relish about the Valentine's Day party.. How utterly mean and rude of me.

First of all this joke must be told... since I absolutely love it.

How do you make a lemon have an orgasm?
Tickle its citrus..
Ohh it kills me every time... ^_^ (does that even look like a smiling face.. I don't know.. looks more feline than human to me)

So the Valentine's Day party was a ton of fun. The house as always was refurnished with red appliances, raped with heart shaped decorations, and expanded to the brim with people dressed in red and pink. This year for the entertainment portion of the evening, we had a fortuneteller..., which I believe tickled many people's fancy. I personally don't believe in all the crap they spew about losing my left leg during the next harvest moon... but I guess once in a while its okay to let ourselves indulge.

So here are some pictures from the Valentine's Day party...
Abizer and I...in our red uniforms

Jane, Alifiya, and Roshanee

Abizer and Sejal

Shivani, Ann, Sejal, and Amrita

My baby, Sasha, in a pink frock and mama Khush

So the moving on from February we come to the month of March. We have three birthdays in this fabulous month. Jane on the 3rd, Ann on the 17th, and Sejal on the 31st. Freakishly they are all on Saturdays. I was quite perplexed at the anomaly. But hey I am not complaining.

Jane's birthday as you might have guessed just recently passed and it was shrouded by laughter, dancing, ice cream cake, orange slices, sugar madness, stripper lap dances, and other forms of naughtiness. So Suman invented some 5 shot competition to see who drank the fastest and since everyone knows I can barely shallow water at a decent pace.. I thankfully was excluded from all of the games. Not to mention I was driving down to Jersey that day from Boston. Poor Jane was subjected to participating in all the competitions...

Soon after Roshanee and I were in the mood for some Latin loving so we played some salsa music to sway our hips to..but soon Ann hopped into the center and booty pushed us all away while we stared in awe. ^_^ To get even, Jane grabbed her and sat on her... making her produce her high frequency sequel which resonated off the walls.

When it came time for the gift giving ceremony everyone gathered around.. deciding it was only appropriate to give the birthday girl a lap dance from everyone in attendance. The usual shy rather jerky hip shaking occurred one person after another until Sush ran full speed and hopped into Jane's lap. He then bent his torso so that his crotch literally went into Jane's mouth, all while he nonchalantly grinded to the music. After that no one dared to upstage that rebellious act of carnal movement.

Afterwards I sadly kicked everyone out of the apartment as Rosh and I loaded up our Black Stallion and started our drive home to Jersey for our Spring break filled with wedding hair and makeup trials, skiing, and new wood floors.

Picking Cotton and Late Night Conversations

Okay so I remember what happened Saturday. I must have buried it deep beneath my psyche to forget about the trauma I endured of being sold... yes you read that properly I was sold. I now have a master.

So Saturday of last week, so that means the 24th of February, Roshanee's Sorority had a Date Auction. Abizer was in town and apparently was not intimidated by the so-called college crowd. The night progressed without any digressions. That is until I was called up to stage to be auctioned off...

When a Fraternity boy bid on me for $300.00, Abizer quite swiftly spat out $500.00. I think it would be an understatement that the crowd was mystified by this display of masculine pride between the two men. The Fraternity boy thought "ha-ha. Fine." We all thought he had finally accepted defeat against the mighty Alpha male...as the audience waited with held breaths, the Fraternity boy yelled out $510.00. Everyone was shocked and in hysteria as if the plague had been reintroduced into the population. All turned their heads towards Abizer. He yawned and said...nothing. Minutes slowly ticked away on the now looming wall clock. Still nothing was uttered from the Alpha male. The announcer started his countdown...$510.00 going once...$510.00 going twice...All turned their heads towards the Fraternity boy who was now shrinking into his own shadow... he looked at me with disgust now.. Thinking to himself... "Momma’s going to kill me"... I looked from the boy on stage who was profusely sweating... to the man in the audience, who everyone had their eye's on... He looked up at me and saw the confusion and hurt in my eyes... and smiled. He then deftly yelled out...$525.00.....The fraternity boy who was withering away from dehydration due to the profuse tearing and sweating... stumbled away.. while I ran off stage into the arms of my master...

After that we went to Uno's... our usual after school hang out. That in itself is quite the conundrum... we know the food sucks and we know the service is better at a gas station... but we still all congregate amongst the overly decorated walls crying for simplicity while having a canoe jabbed into their left corner wall.

After Uno's with the DPO girls where I easily self inducted myself as Sister Giggles, a waiter who was socially withdrawn, and issues over who was going out...we went to a house party at 649. The street name and person living there has long been forgotten but the infamous apartment number is burned into everyone's memory. Once there... the usual nothingness permeated.. beer pong, hookah, and screaming conversations which the cops could easily hear 5 blocks away at their precinct.

We decided to leave 649 and head home... where Abizer, Ann, Afjal and I... (I have a habit of surrounding myself with people named with the letter A) played Sorry and spoke about topics ranging from why Ann can't look someone in the eye when speaking to them, to why Abizer would deny he was sleeping when he would randomly join the conversation with the oddest personal statement.

The A's in my life... (Alf and Anish are missing from the photo though...)

If you can't see it properly they are making an A symbol with their hands.

That was my weekend...